Cryptid Cocktails

A dark, smoky bourbon cocktail for the harbinger of disaster. Arrives before the bridge collapse. Stays through the aftermath. Pairs with impending doom and genuine concern.

Mocktail: Black cherry soda, smoked syrup, bitters (NA)

Goat-legged, bat-winged, and somehow still the most interesting thing in New Jersey. A tart, herbaceous sour that lingers longer than it should and makes sounds your guests cannot explain.

Mocktail: Lemon, pine syrup, aquafaba, tonic

Cold. Elusive. Better looking than you remembered from that blurry photograph. A slow, contemplative drink for a creature that has been waiting longer than you have.

Mocktail: Barley tea, cardamom syrup, salt, ice

Spotted everywhere, confirmed nowhere. Like your ex, but larger and more believable. A bold, earthy smash with Pacific Northwest credibility and the subtle aroma of pine needles and mystery.

Mocktail: Blackberry, fir syrup, lemon, ginger beer

A reposado tequila cocktail with prickly pear, muddled jalapeño, and a defiant glug of Big Red. Trashy, country, and completely untamed — same as the swamp it crawled out of. Rim it in Tajín or don't bother showing up.

Mocktail: Black tea, vanilla bean, prickly pear, Big Red, smoked salt rim (NA)

Vodka and sour apple liqueur shaken with apple, lemon, and a little sugar, then crowned with whipped cream and a grenadine drizzle. The cherry is the helmet, the pointed apple slice is the cowl, and the glow is entirely your problem. Best served in low fog with the porch light off.

Mocktail — The Bright-Eyed Braxxie: Cloudy apple juice, green apple cordial, lemon, lemon-lime soda, whipped cream, grenadine

White rum, blue curaçao, and coconut cream stretched long with pineapple, lime, and a lemon-lime float. Pale, tall, and suspiciously calm — like something walking across a Central Valley lawn at 3 a.m. with somewhere to be. Serve over ice and don't check the footage.

Mocktail — The Near Dark Crawler: Horchata, NA blue curaçao syrup, coconut cream, lime, pineapple, lemon-lime soda